Personal but proud

So today, in my last Contemporary Literature lecture of the year (Contemp Lit being the class that has brought you such exciting entries as "Sex in the GTA" and "Who's Blogging Now?"), the two Profs Stephen (also my TA) and James, and TA Megan, showcased some of the creative projects they most admired from their students. I went to class hoping to be amused, astounded and moved by some of the projects, and I got more than that.
My zine, "Gadunkadunkdunk: For Ladies with Junk in the Trunk" was the first creative project I had done in university, and I became married to my work. It was personal, cutting, self-deprecating and celebratory all at once and I really loved it, so to hand it in on March 14th was really difficult. But it was all worth it, because even though Stephen said he would warn the people he wanted to showcase, he didn't get a chance to warn me and presented my zine to the 175 people in our lecture. He asked me to do it, but I couldn't. If he had warned me, I would have prepared something to say, but as it was, I was too surprised and somewhat emotional to say anything at all, so I let him express how he felt about it.
I laughed through most of it but nearly cried when he was done; "Gadunkadunkdunk" is a zine for fat girls, so it celebrates and enjoys them. To find that level of acceptance, both on an academic and social level, is really humbling.
I don't ever plan to write the Great Canadian Novel. That's not the readership I want to cater to. I want to be fun, hip, sarcastic, passionate and witty in just about every bit of fiction writing I do, so I figure I did good to start with.
I can't wait to get it back and start replicating for possible release.

Baby Got Back.

-Laur

Looking over my shoulder...

They're still stalking me. On Tuesday I had to run to Stong to get a form signed by the English office and as I passed the four-way exchange that takes you to different parts of campus near Complex II, I heard it: the telltale sound of angry honking. I looked to my right and THERE THEY WERE A THIRD TIME, on the lawn near the Tait Mackenzie parking lot, honking and passers-by. And then they turned their beady little eyes on me and I basically ran the rest of the way to Stong.
Then this morning, as I was coming out of the remnants of a lovely dream, I was jarred awake by more honking. They were flying over my house, those horrible Canada Geese were. How will I ever escape them?
I'm doomed.

-Laur

Dun dun duuuuuuuuun...

I'm being stalked by two Canada Geese. It started Wednesday afternoon. I had just left my friend Monica and was walking away from the Student Centre to campus walk (because it was such a GORGEOUS day) when I heard a lot of honking. Now, being a Torontonian who has frequented the Zoo and Stong Pond enough times to know what a pissed-off Canada Goose sounds like, I immediately began to look around for the source beaks. And as I approached the CSE, I found them. They were perched on the roof of the impressive glass-fronted building, about 3 storeys high, honking repeatedly at whatever poor soul was walking by at that moment.

I ducked and covered, of course, knowing that I was in prime range for a poop bomb from high altitude, and ran into Curtis to attend my lecture.

Now, this would have been a random, isolated incident except for the fact that as I walked by that same area this afternoon at around 12:30, telling my friend Lia the exact same story I just told you, THERE THEY WERE AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Only this time, they were on the roof of Curtis, honking at the people coming out of the upper-level exits.

Weird, eh? Lia stood there laughing as I freaked out and we ran down the hill to Stong for our class. I walked into the classroom to secure seats for myself and Lia just as a classmate said "Hey, did you guys see those stupid geese on the roof back there?" Another classmate replied "yeah, dumbass things held up my bus for 6 minutes yesterday. They think they own the goddamn school."

I sat down and sighed.

"They're stalking me. If a goose comes wandering down the hall in the next half hour, I apologize in advance," I said.

Ah, the mysteries of York.

-Laur

Zine MACHINE!

So I decided not to do digital poetics for my quasi-creative assignment and now I'm doing a Zine. A Zine is a lot like a magazine but it's more a labour of love than anything else. It's also a collaborative, multi-media, unconventional sort of thing, so I'm having a tremendous amount of fun with it. It's called Gadunkadunkdunk: For Ladies with Junk in the Trunk and it's coming along quite nicely.

Here's a picture of the front cover

<--

Yes, that is my butt.

A labour of love. I can't wait for it to be finished.

A rant, if you will

As I have suspected in the past, some people can be singularly sneaky and underhanded in their discrimination against others. I'm not talking about racism or sexism, but superficial discrimination. It's something I've been facing for years in my search for employment, but this latest experience has me pissed, but not only that, it has me defeated.
I applied for a tour manager position with an education tour group of excellent repute a while back, and they were quick to offer me an interview spot. I have the qualifications and the experience, so I figured things were looking good. They asked that I bring a picture of myself to the interview, so I printed off my best picture and then braved the horrendous weather on Valentine's Day, in the middle of reading week, to go to their downtown offices and fill out a number of invasive question sheets and sit through a short interview. After the interview they said I would hear about the position within the next week, and I left feeling pretty good about the whole thing.
When a phone call, email or letter didn't show up the next week, I began to get a niggling suspicion that all was not well with my application. And sure enough, this evening when I got home from school, a letter from the tour company was waiting for me. It was a very thin letter, so I knew without even opening it what was inside.
I realized after reading the letter what had happened; it had happened before, what was different about this situation? They had asked for a picture and that should have been my first clue. It didn't matter how good my qualifications were or how much experience I had; I'm fat, and obviously didn't have the stamina or physical fitness to guide a group of pre-teens around a city for 3 or 4 days.
I just hate that. It takes a lot of physical strength and fitness to move around a body like mine for 20 years, and I haven't suffered for it like some other overweight people I know. My height is an advantage because it means my weight is distributed more evenly, but still, I have excellent endurance. So yes, I feel discriminated against, and they're small, petty people for feeling that way. My friends say it's their loss.
Well, guess what, kids! It's mine too.

-Laur

Obsessions and Upsets

I am obsessed with Bulk Barn knock-off chocolate mini-eggs. Last year they were SO BAD but it's like the crazy kitchen people with the company decided to work on the recipe and now they're amazing!!!! I'm in trouble for sure.
I would really like the major people in my life to just simmer down and stop moving around. My manager, Kathy, at the Penningtons store I work at has been transferred to another location effective Sunday. I'm pretty bummed about it. Kathy is like the raunchiest person I know and I love spending time with her. She's hilarious but she's also really wise, and I've learned a lot from working with her. The ladies at my work and I are taking her to Montana's for dinner tomorrow night so I'm baking a cake to eat for dessert. I'm really sad to see her go, no matter how good the new manager is apparently going to be. Her name is Sonja and she's described as "everyone's mom". I don't need another mom, I have one. I need a crazy, hilarious, somewhat innapropriate older woman to idolize.
Life is so not fair.

-Laur

Who's blogging now???!!

I am now sitting in my Contemp Lit class (where all excitement in my life is born) and we're talking about Blogs. What is a blog? If you're reading this right now, you know very well what a blog is. A blog is a window into someone's mind, or a window into someone's world.

I read a book called The Baghdad Blog for this lecture. It is a collection of blog entries written by a man named Salam Pax, who wrote about the American occupation of Iraq and how it was affecting himself and the people around him. It is at times hilarious (Pax has an excellent sense of humour and an engaging writing style) and at times horrifying, as well as sad and all too real. Pax had to go into hiding after his blog gained notoriety, but now he's resurfaced to come do interviews in North America. He hasn't posted since sometime in 2004, but his blog is a compelling read. You can read his blog at http://dear_raed.blogspot.com .

An active Baghdad blogger is http://riverbendblog.blogspot.com. Riverbend is the pseudonym for a woman posting in Iraq, and her blog is called "Baghdad Burning". It's recently been turned into a book as well, though I'm not sure my prof knows that. He was really concerned about this lecture because Riverbend hadn't posted anything since Saddam's hanging execution at the end of December but she posted yesterday and quite passionately as well.

Blogging is a strange creature; you can use it to be personal, to be passionate, to be objective or to be offensive. I just like to share.

-Laur